Feeling better, still have a job...

So I guess I was a little out of it last week. I really did start thinking more deeply about the objects of my fascination and desire and feeling pretty awful about it. It was kind of kicked of by a really hateful and ignorant email I got, more fallout from the 'portrait of a pretender' article that completely ignored every point in the article and made me - and all DPW's - sound like a cross between hitler and NAMBLA. It was the exact kind of email I would expect from Tea Party members if Michelle Bachman were in a wheelchair. And before you ask - even in a wheelchair she would still make me vomit....

So where does that leave me? Still feeling pretty crummy, still keeping a low profile. I've gone through a lot of my pictures- well, the ones I have left since Flickr deleted my old profile - and I'm more or less going with pretenders and disabled models who are willing participants in their sexualization now for my masturbatory explorations... Oh, and casts, too. There is a lot more cast fetish, like real hard-core sexual cast fetish, than I realized.

Maybe it's a sign of maturity, maybe it's just me letting all the haters get to me, but if I see a candid pick of a smoking hot girl in a chair, it's not really doing as much for me now. Pretenders and others like Candi still do, however... in a big way.

Thanks to all who sent me nice and kind things, and I'm glad my little meltdown at least made for lively discussion. This isn't a condemnation of anyone out there, it's a personal realization only. Hope I haven't upset or disappointed anyone.

New Blog - So what's going on?

So a lot has happened since my appearance in New Mobility, and not all of it has been great. My Flickr account was closed due to anonymous complaints, I was discussed at length on a number of blogs, including Roger Ebert's facebook page, and I have been contacted by two different TV shows to do features on me....

And Heather is losing her fucking mind.

I don't blame her, by the way - I'm freaked out too. This is a WAY bigger spotlight than either of us are comfortable with. I mean, yes, I use fake names on my website, I haven't published pics of me in many years, but all the details of my life - the crash, using a wheelchair at work because of back issues, etc... It's all real and might be obvious to anyone who knws me even casually in real life.
Before this happened I wouldn't expect anyone outside of pretender/fetishist circles to stumble across my blog, and if someone I knew put the pieces together, well, it would probably be because they're into the fetish and they probably wouldn't post a threat to my 'secret identity', because I'd have something on them, too. Now, though... my MOM likes Roger Ebert. Everyone I know watches TLC (one of the channels wanting to do a piece on me). I would lose my job if my company found out. I'd lose most of my friends and family if this came out. My weird little existence has been pushed way farther into the open that I expected, and we're kind of freaked out by that.

So that's the deal - I'm going to drop off the radar a bit, I need to talk to Heather about the book - because what if I put it up for sale and, again, it gets picked up by other 'normal' media and the spotlight flips on again? I'm OK, I'm safe, but we're both a little more freaked out by all this stuff than we expected...

Sorry all - stay kinky!

Blog - These are a few of my favorite things...

I came across a YouTube video recently, featuring a pretty well known wheelchair model named Simone. It was a simple video - her getting out of bed, putting lotion on her legs, and getting dressed - no nudity, very tastefully done. It was at the same time both completely innocent, and incredibly erotic - at least to me and I'm sure others 'like me' as it were. I've watched it over a dozen times now, just admiring it, admiring the way she moves and handles herself and her soft, obviously useless legs.



Obviously the video was done as a promotion for devotee erotica, and there's nothing wrong with that - I hope she makes a great living doing that, I sure wish I could. But I think it underlines a big difference between erotica made for wheelchair fetishists/devotees and 'normal' porn. People say we're perverts, we're deviants, but I'm not getting off on seeing someone fucked in the ass or getting cum shot all over her face, which is prevalent in even normal 'vanilla' porn. I'm watching a beautiful woman move, watching her express herself. I'm not getting off on 'overcoming adversity' like some MDA poster child, I'm watching someone who moves and lives a bit different from the 'norm', but it's clearly normal for her and she's embracing it, she's living her life and, to me, that's both fascinating and sexy.

I love the video and I just thought I'd share...

Weekend Quad Play

I don't play quadriplegic very often, because it's actually kind of boring for Heather and it's hard to pretend without a power chair. We did do the extreme quad amputee scene I posted about previously, but that was more of an 'experiment' than a genuine erotic roleplay. I'm more of a para fetishist anyway, so it's not something I'm really into THAT much - but I fantasize about it sometimes. You know me :)

This weekend we were hanging in the house and I mentioned quad fantasy - not as something I was asking to do, just a mention more than anything - and Heather and I started to talk about it a bit. Heather finally said 'Go lay on the bed and wait for me - I have an idea.' - well, I looked at her with a curious and somewhat curious, somewhat nervous look, and she laughed and said it wasn't THAT kind of idea... so I wheeled into the room and did what she asked, just lay on the bed, fully clothed.

Heather came in naked and said I was a quad - it was a roleplay and I couldn't move anything from my neck down, poor thing... yeah, it turned me on. A LOT. So Heather started to slowly undress me, all whiel I was trying to keep from moving anything. I wasn't even sure what to say, so I mostly stayed quiet as she undressed me sensually. She slipped my t-shirt and bra off, moving my arms and body for me, then unbuttoned my skirt and slipped that off, rolling me gently - I was in heaven! She started playing with my feet then, and told me she wished I could feel all the love and attention she was giving them... she played with my feet for a while, maybe twenty minutes? All the while I lay there and just felt so good. Finally she slipped up and pulled my diaper off- she had ignored it until then - and she worked my unmoving legs to pull one of my strap-ons up my thighs and fastened it tightly to me. She gave me head, sucking on the pink rubber cock, and then lubed it up and straddled me, telling me how good it felt, how she wished I could reach up and grab her, but she knew I couldn't... I was so hot and turned on I was buzzing by this point, so totally wet, and the way she was fucking me and the way the harness of the strap-on was rubbing against me, I'm pretty sure before she did, and she came really hard a few times. It was so amazingly hot, a really nice scene that she said she'd be totally into doing it again...

Shoes, Wheelchairs, and Fetishes

So Heather and I have been having an interesting philosophical discussion over the last few days, mostly stemming from the AMAZING new shoes she bought me. Is it sexier to see a woman in a wheelchair barefoot (or wearing stockings and no shoes) or wearing some kind of sexy shoes. Obviously this is personal preference, but we broke it down into three basic 'camps'

Barefoot

Personally, I love either barefoot or stockings/knee socks in a wheelchair. I feel like not wearing shoes somehow enhances the sense of disability. I also love how, on some real paras, the feet are somewhat curled, or flaccid - they just 'look' more disabled, and thats' a huge turn-on for me, personally. Heather likes the 'no shoes' look because it shows off the feet, and she certainly doesn't mind me wheeling around the house barefoot, but it's actually not her preference - which kind of surprised me.

'Normal' shoes

Neither of us are a fan of this. By 'normal' shoes we mean sneakers, flats, loafers, pedal pushers, more 'conservative' shoes. The only exception is Mary Janes, which I like to wear with schoolgirl outfits. (OK boys, picture that in your head for a minute. You're welcome.) Normal conservative shoes just seem 'blah' - both in and out of the wheelchair. Needless to say, we don't own many pairs of these.

'Extreme' shoes and fashion shoes

Here is Heather's preference, but she's a foot fetishist more than a wheelchair fetishist, so this is her preference across the board. By 'extreme' shoes I mean shoes that are so 'outside the norm' that I probably couldn't walk in them if I tried - like ballet heels. Fashion shoes are shoes like Manolo Blahnik and other high end styles that I couldn't afford if I sold a kidney. We've got plenty of knockoffs, though - Heather loves red and pink stiletto heels, peep toes and strappy sandals as well as classic black patent stilettos. I love shoes that tie on somehow, like a strap or silk tie, like the ones HEather just bought me. I like those because I feel like they're tied on so they won't slip off my paralyzed feet :)

So what does everyone else prefer? You prefer barefoot? Sexy shoes? Something else entirely? Let me know - I'd love to hear from you!

Finally - there is a sex podcast that I love to listen to, 'Having Sex, with Katie Morgan', that has been on for a few weeks now. Well I was listening Episode 10, from Wednesday, August 3rd, that was all about fetishes. It was a good episode, interesting and funny and sexy, but then the last question was about disability fetish! This guy is into wheelchairs and crutches and amputee pretending and they have a pretty good discussion about medical fetish in general - I was blown away and really impressed - and really turned on! You can download and listen for free - give it a try!

MARCH?? My last post was March????

Wow do I suck at this. Sorry all, here's the deal - I had a falling out with a web-friend who I was really fond of, she was wonderful and fun and sexy and I fucked it up and was a bitch and I and took things too far and I think I hurt her pretty bad, and I felt like shit about it and so I haven't been doing much lately.
Today, however, I got a GREAT email from another female dev-related writer, Ruth Madison, and talking to her really got my writer's juices flowing again, so to speak (totally metaphorically, she's hetero, but a great writer) and so I decided to brush off the old blog... I had no idea it had been so long though... sorry!!

Anyway, by way of apology, I'll tell you about my date this weekend - I think you'll like it...


Cathy's Date

So Heather had worked really long hours last week, we had barely seen each other all week, which makes us both kind of cranky. We're in love, what can I say? Well, I wanted to do something nice for her, something I knew she'd like, so I made a plan....

I worked Friday night and she always lets me sleep in On Saturdays, so when I finally woke up around 10:30am I could hear her in the living room watching HGTV. I put on an outfit I knew she would love, then instead of getting in my wheelchair I put on my eye patches and dark glasses and grabbed my white cane. I was barefoot, and wearing a mismatched outfit of maroon skirt and a patterned blue and silver top. Visually they clash terribly, but to the touch they're very similar, so it made sense that I got dressed by touch.

I heard her pop off the couch as she heard the first tap tap tap of my cane down the hall, and she was kissing me before she even said anything. When I'm blind, a sudden sensory impact like that - my lover grabbing me and forcing her tongue down my throat - is really disorienting, and I stumbled a little, Heather grabbing me and helping me stay up. She asked what the occasion was, and I told her I knew she had a bad week, and I wanted to make her feel better. I reached out with one bare foor to where I thought she was standing, and met her calf with my toes - I heard her breathe in a little and then her hand was between my legs, rubbing my panties. I think I giggled and said she was going to knock me over if she kept distracting me like that, and we ended up heading to the kitchen, me tapping my way there, her loving every minute of it. She made me waffles for breakfast and we played footsie under the table as she helped me eat. I got my foot between her legs (something I never get to do as a para) and under her skirt, and she was moaning in orgasm before we finished our orange juice. I could feel her wet sex all over my toes, and it really turned me on too. After breakfast we ended up making out ont he couch for a bit while watching - well, me listening to - the TV.

A few hours later, and I was pretty well acclimated to my blindness (I told her I'd go all day for her if she wanted) and Heather asked if I wanted to go out. I was a little hesitant, because we've only done it a handful of times and I'll admit, it's intimidating walking around in unfamiliar territory unable to see anything. I told her sure, though, and ased what she wanted to do. She said the movies - now this is a weird kink of Heather's that goes along with her blindness fascination, to go to the movies with me and then ask me about what I 'saw' in my minds' eye based on what I heard. It kind of gets her off in a somewhat inexplicable way. I guess similar to my fantasies of seeing my sex penetrated and having no sensation - can't explain it, but it turns me on a LOT...

So as we're getting ready to go and Heather is dresing me (in mostly matching clothes, or so she told me, I never did see myself) she tells me to sit on the bed so she can put my stockings on. Instead of smooth silky stockings though, I feel the familiar sensation of an ACE bandage being applied, and my toes and arch being manipulted, in a pseudo foot-binding position. This is something we found by experimentation and it's very hard to describe, but it binds my feet in such a way that it's pressty comfortable, but impossible to stand or walk. Heather bandages me well, taking care to ask how it feels, and then I feel her pull knee socks over my bandaged feet, then some sort of slippers - definitely not shoes.

She helps me into my wheelchair, and I'm squirming I'm so turned on. She wheels me out to the garage and helps me into the car, and we drive to a theater about 45 minutes away, give or take. Far enough where we won't bump into anyone we know, anyway. The whole ride, I'm telling Heather about how it feels to be blind, how I'm interpreting the sounds and feelings and movement, and she's telling me how sexy my crippled feet look at the same time. By the time we got to the theater I was soaked and glad I was wearing a diaper, and Heather actually she said she wished she was wearing one too - I felt her up and her panties were soaked through, literally. I wish we could have fucked right there in the parking lot, we were both so turned on...
So we went to see Pirates of the Carribbean 4, but it was sold out, both shows. We ended up seeing 'Priest' instead, which sounded cool. It was easy to follow the story, anyway, and I think because I was completely focused on the dialog and not the eye candy, I figured out the 'big secret' way before Heather did.

It is a very different and weird sensation, sitting in a movie theater listenign to the dialog of a movie without seeing it, and even weirder wearing a diaper and sitting in a wheelchair with bound, crippled feet. I wonder what I looked like to anyone who saw me. I know Heather loved it, and I kept whispering little things like 'what does she look like, she sounds hot' and such.
We got home and ordered pizza, and Heather helped me eat again, this time actualyl feeding me while I kept my hands in my lap. It was unspoken, but we were kind of playing me as a quad, at least in my mind. Well, not totally, because I kept touching myself as she fed me.

We didn't even bother with TV, instead going right to bed for some amazing sex, and I got a nice buzzy vibe in my ass, which sent me right off the deep end of orgasm, and I ate her out for I don't know how long, the vibrating butt plug in the whole time - got it was amazing. Let me tell you - Lesbian sex is AWESOME - don't let anyone tell you different.

After we finished, I 'de-crippled' myself and we got cleaned up and then cuddled for a while, then fell asleep...

The End

Hope you liked it :)

All I want for Christmas....

OK maybe not ALL I want for Christmas, but a friend recently turned me on to Paracuties.com, a wheelchair fetish site that currently only features one girl in one video, but she's REALLY hot, so I don't care. Check out the Youtube sample or go to their website and check out the sample photos - the look, the poses, the scenes are all pretty much spot on for any wheelchair fetishist or devotee (though I know some devotees will not like the fact that she's a pretender.)



I haven't seen the full video, so I have no idea how realistic she is throughout, but her 'leg cross' in the sample vid was hot and well done. She lacks confidence in her wheelchair use and control, but again, I love the 'new para' fantasy. There's no audio on the sample, don't know if I'd be into a whole 40+ minute video with little to no audio. Not sure about that one.

Of course I'll probably never see it, because again I have a problem with the price - at least as far as I understand it. Now $30 for a 42 minute vid DOES seem a good price, I have no problem there - I'd like it $5-$10 cheaper, sure, but that's because I'm poor. My problem is that, from what I can tell, that $30 is just a 7 day rental. You can watch your video - the one that you bought and downloaded to your own computer - for 7 days, then it apparently stops working. At least that's what I understand from reading through the website. If I'm reading something wrong here please point it out and correct me. I'd be thrilled to be wrong in this case.
I totally understand putting some kind of DRM on these videos to keep people from trading them freely - I've been part of the dev community for a long time, I know that paid for and copyrighted material gets traded like pokemon cards in this scene, and that this really hurts the businesses that are trying to provide us great material - thats why I stopped using any of the trading sites or services years ago, and I actually put my money down whenever I can to buy content and support these people. But I don't have a lot of money, and even LESS money that I can spend on fetish content, so I can't waste $30 on a hot video I only get to masturbate to for a week, and I can't go and spend $20 a month for some subscription service to see a few new pics and maybe a 3 minute video each week. Give me a 20-30 vid for $20 and make it quality, give me something I want to see, I'll buy it in a heartbeat. Give me the ability to buy it via PayPal or make the CC receipt something really innocuous and nondescript, and I don't even have to ask Heather for permission, so we ALL win there....
Anyway I guess this turned into more of a rant that I had thought it would, but I hope it made some sense...

Happy Holidays All!!!

TLC show looking to do a segment on devotees

So I have been contacted by the below person, Michelle, who represents the Learning Channel show 'Strange Sex' - she requested I be part of the segment, but for obvious reasons I cannot. However she asked that if I could point any Devotees in her direction, so here it is - casting call for devotees. I'll let you read how she described the program to me. If you're interested, all her contact info is listed below - be polite and only contact her if you're genuinely interested and can be part of the show. Thanks!! I know I for one really want to see this show!

________________________________________________

My name is Michele and I am a casting producer for a medical series on TLC called "Strange Sex." The series, now entering its second season, highlights unusual sexual conditions and lifestyles, with a goal of educating the viewer and shedding light on a little understood, real-life condition or situation. We know that topics we explore might be shared among members of our audience who'd appreciate the subjects being brought to light, and the erasing of any misconceptions or myths.

As we gear up for our new season, we are looking at a number of topics to explore in our episodes, among them, someone who considers themselves a devotee.

Ideally, we are looking for someone who lives in the United States. We'd like to speak about appearing in our program, since our goal is to provide context for the person's story and education to our viewers. We tell the story in a respectful and sensitive manner. We don't even have a narrator for this show -- the stories are told in the words of the people profiled.

I wanted to reach out to you to see if you might be interested in talking about your situation and the devotee community, and to learn more about our program.

Many thanks - I look forward to connecting.

--
Michele Spinak
Sirens Media
Email: strangesexcasting@gmail.com
office: 301-920-9860
cell: 301-792-9784
fax: 301-920-9880

I guess it's been a while...

I hadn't realized how long it had been since I posted - sorry about that. I was getting better at it for a while...

So I've been writing more lately, but most of it has been for the book, which is actually looking pretty great, just slow going. Harder to write a novel then I thought... I'm writing some other stories as special requests, too, but they also requested I not post those publicly so for now, no new story here. Sorry about that. I do take requests though, and I especially love writing stories based on pictures, I've had some great success there :)

So instead of a full story I'll tell you about what Heather and I did this past weekend, I think my fans will enjoy the tale ;)

I was in my wheelchair and Heather had bought me a new pair of very sexy stockings. She slowly, sensually pulled them up onto my legs, one at a time -it was so sexy! Then she layed on the living room floor, on her back, and told me to wheel over to her. I parked my wheelchair right at her head and used my hands to lift my limp, useless legs and put my feet right on her face. She loved it, she kissed and licked and caressed my feet as I sat there in my wheelchair, she told me how soft and sexy they felt to her, and kept telling me how limp and crippled they felt, how I'd never feel her touches again...
After a little while I was just so turned on I couldn't help it, I reached into my diaper and started fingering myself - I came so hard as Heather worshipped my feet and told me how crippled I was, it was intense...

Hope you liked it as much as I did ;)

Blog - Be careful what you wish for....

So I'm sure everyone at this point knows about my long term relationship with Heather. I'm a devotee/pretender/wheelchair fetishist with some pretty twisted ideas of sexuality, she is a foot worshiper who doesn't mind my disability fetish as long as she has plenty of access to my sexy feet.

What most people don't know is that I'm kind of a bitch and I often push the boundaries of our relationship to get my way. That means trying to get Heather to use my wheelchair (she doesn't like it) or getting her to humiliate me, change my diapers, not to mention my obsession with erotic chats and all my chat partners. That does bother her, but I still do it because there are certain things I need sexually that she's just not into giving me. I still lover her very, very much and she knows it, but sometimes I just need a little something more.

Enter this weekend. I was being my usual annoying self and trying to get her to make me a quad amputee based on my silly Facebook quiz. I wanted to spend a little time totally helpless, the idea was really turning me on, but Heather isn't that into it - again, she's into my feet, so anything including leg amputations just isn't her thing. Add to that the helplessness, feeding me, changing me, etc... - well, we've actually only done quad amputee once before, as a costume where I was Helena from Boxing Helena and Heather played Dr. Nick, Julian Sands' character.

Well Heather finally gave in yesterday. I could tell she was a little annoyed but I was getting my way so I didn't really care. So we went into the bedroom and I stripped naked and Heather started bandaging my arms up and putting beige 'stump socks' on them - actually converted opaque pantyhose. Next were my legs and she sucked on my toes a bit before bandaging my legs up and putting another pair of stump socks on my DAK stumps. I asked for my diaper in my cutesy sweet voice but she said no and seemed a little cold, so I asked what was wrong. She told me she had plans for me and a minute later I had a vibrating butt plug pressed into my bottom and she was rubbing my clit and she was fingering me. God it only took me maybe two minutes to cum and I cried out and wriggled on the bed moaning and bucking my hips as she kept fingering me.

Well ladies - and maybe men, I have no idea about you - you know when, after a good orgasm, you're kind of super-stimulated, where even the slightest touch can set you off and you feel all tingly and really almost ticklish? Well that's where I was, but Heather kept going. I tried to wriggle out of the way - being the only thing I could do as a quad amp that was suddenly feeling a lot more than 'pretend'. It was so sensative I just wanted to her stop, just wanted her to lay off for a minute so I could catch my breath, but she wouldn't. I told her it was too much and she smiled - she actually smiled - and then took one of my favorite vibrators, one of the 'rabbit' style with the little ears for clitoral stimulation, and started fucking me with that.

I just about screamed and tried to get out of the way, tried to stop her, but I wasn't going anywhere and she knew it, and soon I was having more orgasms and was just screaming and I think at this point possibly crying, I can't remember....

She left the rabbit vibrator in my pussy and rolled me over, then pulled the butt plug out. She put on her strap-on dildo and I felt it pushing slowly into my ass and then she was fucking me again as I lay there with my 'stumps' spread. It was a little awkward with my feet back there but she managed to pump my ass for I have no idea how long, the rabbit vibe still in my pussy making me feel very, very full. It was honestly starting to really hurt, but feeling really good at the same time, I came again and again. I think I counted eleven orgasms but I don't even remember where I stopped counting.

So this went on in various ways for around three, three and a half hours. She gave me a break in the middle and fed me water through a straw and some grapes (I love grapes) and part of it was spooning and cuddling me, but overall is was just non stop sex and I had nothing I could do about it. I ate her out like three times? I think three times, yeah, made her cum, but she just kept going at me.

So by the end I was a complete mess. I was crying hysterically and screaming for her to stop, to just please stop, but she wouldn't, and I was crying and still having orgasms, even though I hurt, my stomach ached and my legs ached and my shoulders ached and I was mad and miserable and so pissed at Heather I just couldn't stop having orgasms and every one made me scream and cry and it was just a complete mess.

So Heather finally finished with me and kissed me - I glared at her, pissed off, and she asked why I was mad, since she finally gave me the loss of control I had been fantasizing about. She undid my bandages and rubbed my legs and arms and did finally put a diaper on me (which I used immidiately and then changed myself later) and then we just lay in bed and talked for like an hour.

She was right, of course - she treated me exactly like I've fantasized about, all my crazy disabled rape fantasies and such, and it was awful, just awful, but at the same time it was incrediby erotic. Insanely hot. It's hard to get my head around it, I'm really confused even two days later. She didn't abuse me, of course, she didn't hit me or hurt me - well, not 'hurt' me in the traditional sense, though my abs and shoulders and hips are still sore and you don't even want to know how my pussy and ass feel even two days later. So I'm still really confused. I'm trying to look at it and feel turned on and part of me really does, but the reality of it all, it's just...

I don't know, I honestly don't know how I feel right now. Aside form feeling like I want to cry all over again, reliving it like this.

BLOG - Aaaand.. They're gone...

Those amazing AFO braces I saw on eBay? SOLD! Someone must have done the 'Buy it Now' option - seemed like a good deal, coming with free crutches and all. Ah well - I couldn't have afforded them anyway. I guess I could hope and dream that Heather bought them for me in secret and will give them to me as a birthday present :)

Blog - I have never been so horny in my life...

I am so wet right now after seeing this Japanese video a friend sent me. A girl in a wheelchair, in public, and there's a dildo in the seat of the wheelchair that she's sitting on, as as she is wheeled around the dildo pumps up and down into her. I'm serious, I'm so hot right now I'm practically lightheaded.

Here's the Video

I want braces!!!!

I found this pair of AFO braces on Ebay tonight - they are PERFECT! They're specifically for brace and bondage fetish, and they're very sexy! They've actually got d-rings on the back of the braces so you can use them for bondage - I just imagine Heather locking my legs to my wheelchair so I can't get out of it. That's so SEXY!! I really love them!

So, any devotee out there want to buy me a pair of braces? Pretty please :)

Sexy wonderful braces!!! (I think you have to log into Ebay to see them, they're under the 'adult' section...)

Blog - so I'm going to try it...

Thanks to the fairly overwhelming response to my 'would you buy my book' question, I'm going to do it. OK, I'm going to TRY to do it. I'm starting today on an anthology of short stories dealing with all aspectsof the devotee, wannabe, and pretender community. I'll probably throw some recreational casting in there as well. I'm excited to give this a shot - maybe all my work over the years has been moving towards this goal.

So my first story, which I'm about 3 pages into, is called 'Paradise Found' and it's a futuristic tale set in a world where society is rebuilding itself after a terrible tragedy, and women who volunteer to help 'repopulate' the planet are rendered quadriplegic and then impregnated and cared for by society. It's a cool conceptand I like the characters so far. I think I'm really going to outdo myself for this book! I hope people are as excited as I am for it!

Question - would you buy my book?

If I were to self publish a novel-sized work of fiction - either single long form story or book of short stories, how many people would buy it? What's best - one long narrative or a book of shorter stories?

BLOG - New Story posted, but...

I published my newest story this morning, because I couldn't wait to share, but because I had actually written/finished it the other day and was just sitting on it, it's showing up earlier in the blog timeline, I'm not sure how to fix that. Anyway, my newest story, 'Close Encounters of the Devotee Kind' was just published, so I hope everyone likes it! It's a little different but I think it's fun.

Cathy

Blog - Another story ready to go

So I posted my newest story yesterday and then immediately started writing another crazy fun story which I just finished this morning. I think I'll wait a few days before posting it, though - don't want to flood the blog after the recent drought.

How do most people get my blog updates? How do you get other blog updates? Do you just check? Or maybe follow a twitter feed, or my yahoo profile? I'm just curious. Is there a way that would work better for people? Some kind of notification system? again, just curious.

I wanted to thank people for giving me ideas for stories - obviously it worked well :) Feel free to give me ideas any time, sometimes they really trigger my creative (and other ;) ) juices... so if you have ideas, if you have some fantasy or dream story, go ahead and drop me a line (Paracathy at hotmail) or comment here. Hope everyone enjoys what I've got coming up...

BLOG - has it really been 3 weeks?

Shit - why the hell does it take so long to update this thing? Maybe I'm just bored. I shouldn't be bored, but I guess sometimes you just get into a routine and suddenly you find yourself bored with everything...

I really cannot get into the mood to finish anything I start writing. I have ideas but by the time I get them half written I think they're crap. I need inspiration...

What should I write about?

Blog - Annoyed....

OK, I found a new video on Youtube that has me really hot and bothered. It's a Japanese pretender video, she does a great left arm amputee with cosmetic prosthetic, a leg amputee on crutches, and a REALLY hot para amputee. The video is a sample from the Cast Girls Japan (GipsGips) series and the description says you can get more(likely for purchase) at a Clips4Sale link. The only problem is that the pretender video doesn't seem to be there!! I found it on GipsGips, but I can't read Japanese and have no way of figuring out how to order it or even how much it is.

I really wanted to beg Heather to let me get it, too, and if it was a clips4sale download it would be so easy and convenient, but it's just not there. They would have almost definitely had a sale, too - pretender vids are SO hard to come by, and a combo pretender video is pretty much unheard of! I really wanted it.

And for all you devs who don't give a shit about my woes but just want to see the pretty video, here's the link...

Here you go

Cathy

Blog - very naughty...

I had to do a ton of work around the house today getting ready for company later in the week, doing a bunch of laundry and cleaning the kitchen, swiffering the bathrooms - you know, boring stuff.

Of course when I got up I was doing some writing first, only like a half hour, and it made me so horny (I was writing chapter 5 of 'New Arrangement - it will be ready soon my kinky friends, and is it HOT...) and was just so hot and bothered that I took a vibrating buttplug and inserted it, in full vibrate mode, and put my diaper on and satin my wheelchair and did all my housework like that - while also listening to Lady GaGa.

so, first, I am lusting after Lady GaGa lately. Second, sitting on a vibrating buttplug on a gel wheelchair seat is a pretty damn amazing experience. I am glad I wore a diaper, because I would have flooded my seat from the orgasms I had. I'm serious, at one point it was pretty much one continuous orgasm that felt like it lasted 15 minutes.

And yes, I am a died-in-the-wool Lesbian, but I'm sorry, anal penetration feels really good. If you don't believe me, try it.

As I was doing all this I actually killed the (brand new) batteries in the buttplug, though by that point I was so stimulated I didn't actually realize it stopped buzzing for some time, not sure when they died.

I actually considered wearing the plug to work, but there's no way I'd be able to concentrate so I just took it out a little while ago. I'll be wearing a diaper all night though, that's for sure. Still very moist. Maybe I'll just wear slippers into work too, since I'll be in my chair, of course.